An Excerpt.

[Taken from my journal entry on August 27, 2009: through the trial.]


I hold onto hope, I will not let go. I am reminded of the worship song entitled, ‘Come Just As You Are.’ The lyrics ring in my mind.

“Come just as you are; hear the Spirit call. Come just as you are. Come and see, come receive, come and live forever. Life everlasting and strength for today. Taste the living water and never thirst again.”

I want strength for today, tomorrow and the next day. I rejoice in my struggles. I also rejoice in the love of God, I praise Him for when I am weak then He is strong. My God is so big, so strong and so mighty, there’s nothing my God cannot do for me and anyone who calls on Him. The most important thing I remember is that, because of His great compassion and undying love for me, His child, He wants me to rely on Him. God wants to heal me of my past hurts; no matter what state I am in, no matter the stage of desperation I am going through. God wants me just as I am, at this time. If God's power is made perfect in my weakness (2 Cor. 12:9) then should I not allow God to have all the glory and give Him complete control of what I am going through? If I don't, perhaps God is not receiving all the glory I can offer Him, even if it is glory through my sufferings.

Jesus quotes in Luke 4, a passage from Isaiah 61 which says, "The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because He has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor."

Isaiah states chapter 61 verses 1-3, "The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor
and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion- to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor."

I feel the need to give over that spirit of despair, to release to God my mourning; I give it up to God so that not only may I receive the replacements of the oil of gladness and a garment of praise, but in doing so God may receive glory and His splendor may be displayed

God is my ultimate comforter and healer. He can help me forgive past hurts. He can heal emotional scars from years of hurts and wounds… Not only heal, but remove – as if they were never there. Nothing is impossible for Him.

My prayer is that my life would be filled with forgiveness and healing.